Not Working At Hooters

Wow. It's been way too long since the last post. We apologize to our loyal fans. Well, as you can imagine we've been up to a lot since the last post. There has been an outing to Child's Park with two of our friends which involved much hiking. It also involved wading/sitting in water under the falls (which means that there was also some changing from jeans to bathing suits/shorts in the middle of a crowded state park). The trip yielded some fantastic photos of us playing in waterfalls, as well as with big sticks (tickling trees, fighting, etc...). 

We also have this tendency to hang out with substitute teachers from high school (well that's an exaggeration, but this particular substitute is actually our friend). He, Rocky*, Reno, and Roxie were sketchballs and hung out in the parking lot of KINGS playing with shopping carts and all the ridiculous props that exist in Roxie's trunk. Remember when we said to be on the lookout for the lampshade? Well, here it is!!:

Most of the adventures of the past week have led to thrift stores such as unique, the salvation army, and incog-neat-o, where we've each purchased some shoes and jewelry and so on and so forth. There are pictures to prove that we were, in fact, in said thrift stores:

Roxie with worlds best bustier and flower crown. She bought some sweet saks fifth avenue heeled low boots, and that necklace that she's wearing right there. Reno bought a fantastic pair of keds from the 70s, but not the had or gun pictured below. 

We also stumbled across some very very very old beer in an antique store for $4. We question if it is, in fact, drinkable. You decide. There were also some awkwardly shaped cookie cutters, that turned out to all be versions of Santa carrying a bag of toys.

After, we returned to Roxie's house with Rocky to make some crepes, which was an excellent adventure, until Reno tried to make one when there wasn't enough batter left. Luckily Roxie saved it (or at least made it edible) but it was still dubbed the reject crepe. View Roxie rescuing the reject crepe:

There is also an amazing photo of Reno eating it angrily, but our friends can check facebook for that fabled photo. Roxie's little brother also made a shirtless appearance at the crepe-making festival, which lead to a wonderful photobooth session of Roxie's computer. She would post the pictures, but the shirtlessness might be too much for many of our weaker-stomached readers. 

We also saw the Sex and the City movie. It was alright. We're still deciding how we feel about it. It definitely did the job of bringing closure to the stories of the four, but the cinematography was hideous. We have a game for you when you see it: COUNT THE NUMBER OF TIMES YOU SEE THE MICROPHONE DIP INTO THE FRAME! If you get a number less than 7, you are not observant. 

*It should be noted that Rocky is a new addition to this dynamic duo, thereby making the duo a trio on certain occasions. He is very Italian and has some issues with memory loss (He called Roxie "April" from pre-kindergarden to freshman year of high school). He is oddly flexible and enjoys interpretive dance. In addition to his own dancing, he often criticizes the dancing of Roxie and Reno. 

Lesbian Puppy

We have HAD IT with this rain. We've done everything we could: watched chick flicks, played video games, went to thrift shops, drank hot chocolate. We are RUNNING OUT OF IDEAS, WEATHER!!

Yesterday was pretty blah thanks to the weather and all of our commitments. Roxie got a haircut, Reno dug a ditch. The good news is that Roxie is officially working as a camp counselor this summer, and Reno is almost 100 percent sure that she will too. Fabulosity abounding. We will get lifeguard certified and you will see us standing around near brown lakes blowing whistles and fastening life vests on small children. It is going to be a blast. More on that later.

We visited one of our friends yesterday, Joey. Joey is officially totally insane and brilliant and hilarious. We have decided to make a documentary that is just an hour of him talking, because the boy's brain works like none other. Then we left after a brief discussion since Reno was like falling asleep against a wall and mumbling that her hands hurt.

Possible trips for the future:
Duke Gardens! - next week sometime.
Child's Park!- Saturday! We are recruiting our hiking crew for another fun-filled day of waterfalls and roadtrips. Mmm. Taste the happy. (Michael Bluth: "It tastes kind of like sad...")

TUNES FOR GOONS

Happily, we just downloaded the entirety of Gotye's album Like Drawing Blood after a year of dabbling in our favorite tracks. Freaking sweet, guys. Unique, melodic, catchy, amazing. The beloved classic is of course Heart's a Mess. The video is dark and sucks you in. Something about the animation, the images...

GOTYE HEARTS A MESS

MP3: Gotye- Heart's a Mess

The song will stay with you, I know it. Once you've grown to adore it, have a listen to this totally rocktastic DLake remix. The indie music world is all about the Ocelot remix, but I much prefer DLake, maybe because I stumbled upon it like half a year ago and it blew my mind because I didn't know anyone even knew who Gotye was. Oh yeah, not to mention that Gotye's album of Like Drawing Blood remixes included a version of this.

MP3: Gotye- Heart's a Mess (DLake Remix)

Then there's the unbelievably upbeat and dancy tune of Learnalilgivinanlovin. With a name like that, who could refuse?

MP3: Gotye- Learnalilgivinanlovin

I'm getting overexcited here but I can't very well post the entire album. I'll guess I'll close it all up with this sad, sweet jam from Boardface: Out Here In The Cold. Good for rainy days and wistful gazes out the window.

MP3: Gotye- Out Here In The Cold

Enjoy!

Toodles noodles.

Preggo My Eggo

Another rainy day here in the Jerz. We spent most of our time driving around on splashy highways, trying to find thrift shops. We struggled with GPS and sang along at the top of our lungs to Robyn.

SEE YOU NEXT TUESDAY, YOU IS A PUNK

Speaking of Robyn, Konichiwa Bitches has to be one of our favorite songs EVER. Just check out the crazy ass video, which includes everything from superhero costumes to monkeys and fake glasses.
It's sassy and silly and punchy and fits us to a T. Listen to it. Love it.

Robyn - Konichiwa_Bitches

So anyway, we ended up going to Goodwill and it was freaking sweet. We got some cowboy boots, ankle boots, a Fruits Basket kid's tee, a crepe-maker, and Reno bought a couple big dreamcatchers for her soon-to-be kickabutt dorm room. On the way back there was traffic and Reno stalled the car at a light because she was dancing in her seat and weaving her arms allover the car. We made a note to avoid such behavior during precarious manual-shift moments. We have gone our separate ways to manger a little dinner and then it's out again for some potential Rock Band-age with Mark and Tom or maybe a movie. Who knows? The world is your oyster when you are two girls of ferocious fabulosity.

WHAT ABOUT THE TUNAGE

The rain has us all in a swoony funk, so here's some music to match. We do so dearly love the new Death Cab For Cutie song, all eight and a half minutes of it. Perfect for lying about on beds and wondering where you are going today or what you are doing or why you went running and forgot that the water was shut off so you couldn't take a shower after and must therefore remain stinky for the rest of the afternoon...

MP3: Death Cab For Cutie- I Will Possess Your Heart

Another amazing slow song is this Four Tet remix of Caribou's Melody Day, the original of which is fantastic as well. This version is better suited to the dark trees and drippy windows we have been seeing so much of lately. I owe my knowledge of this one to good ol' Good Weather For Airstrikes, which remains our fave music blog of all.

MP3: Caribou- Melody Day (Four Tet remix)


Shplaters, gators.

A Twisty Bobcat Pretzel

We have acquired a lampshade. That means exactly what it sounds like it means. There was an abandoned lampshade laying in the A&P parking lot. It looked rather lonely without a lamp to cover, so we felt obligated to take it home. It has been traveling around with us for the past few days in the back of Roxie's car, and there is a 1 in 4 chance that it will make an appearance in pictures sometime in the near future. 

That being said, today was most likely one of the best rainy days in a while. It began with a mad-dash trying to make a train to the city, but that failed miserably, especially when we discovered that the person we were trying to meet there was, in fact, in Long Island. Good job telling us ahead of time, loser. 

While in Summit, we went to an art show, but of course it was raining, and we were still trying to pass time until the next train (that was when we still thought that maybe it was a good idea to go to the city anyway). When we realized that the weather was against us, we turned the day into a visit to... THE LIBRARY! Now, that may seem boring, lame actually, but no, we rented a few chick flicks, some cds, and a Vietnamese cookbook!

So, with the music, movies, and cookbook in tow, we returned to Reno's house to view said movies and make said Vietnamese food (because of course Reno's pantry includes the most obscure ingredients... including shrimp paste? whatever). While the chicken defrosted, we ran upstairs (where we had to kick Reno's little sister off of Reno's bed as per usual) to watch Two Weeks Notice, a surprisingly good movie, even if only for the one-liners. 

Examples: 

"Is this belt too flashy, or is it belt-tacular?" 

"I am really good in bed... believe me, pal. You should be so lucky because the lawyery exterior... don't let that fool you, because inside I am, like, a complete animal. It's like, bobcat. You know it's scary... No. No. Look, I can bend like a pretzel. I'm serious. And I'm not talking the straight kind. I'm talking, like, the twisty kind. Twisty, like the bobcat salty kind of pretzel... because that's what men want, right?... The twisty-bobcat kind of pretzel..."

After the movie, we finished cooking what was declared a "keeper" recipe: Ginger Chicken. Yum. Spicy. Sweet. Good. Perhaps we should post the recipe... but that will come here later.

Post-dinner, we finished the movie-film and set out in search of Zita's, which quickly evolved into a search for Red Bull, when we realized that Red Bull would be better than Zita's. In searching for an open Krausers, we stumbled upon Plaster Fun House, which was closed, but never fear! When it is open, we shall return to paint things, and it will be good!

After that, we journeyed to Mark's house for some hardcore Rock Band with Mark and Tom. Reno sang for the first time ever (The Perfect Drug, by Nine Inch Nails*). She sat in a corner and tried to sing softly so that no one could hear her, but we still got to listen because she failed to realize that her voice does, in fact, come through the speaker system. Good job, Reno. Despite her "stage fright" she managed to pull off a 93%. Congratulate her the next time you see her. 

Also, side note: The "Bad Food"** household has very little toilet paper. This seems natural in a house where 86% of the inhabitants are male, but when one of them occupies the shower in the only bathroom with toilet paper, life becomes difficult for female visitors. Shout-out to Joe, who fetched toilet paper for those in need. 

When Tom announced his hunger, we tried to decide on a place to eat, but seeing as we're all indecisive people, the discussion lead to a mass-wrestling match, rather than to a solution. Wrestling soon turned to tickling, when the boys realized how ticklish Roxie is, and decided that torture was fun. Thanks, boys. 

Our excursion to a diner quickly turned into a visit to I-HOP instead (which sadly strays from our title, but deal with it), where the bacon was good, our waiter was cute, and we stole a strawberry. Now, you'd think when I say strawberry, it means a piece of fruit, but no. It was a paper strawberry hanging on the wall. So with the support of the whole group, and the other group of kids in the restaurant, Reno removed removed the thumb-tack holding it in place and stuffed it in Roxie's bag. Be on the lookout for its appearance in Reno's dorm room next year, but until then, it will keep the lampshade company.

Onto la music-a:

In continuation of the female artists from my last post, we have M.I.A. She's fantastic, and we aspire to learn to dance like her as soon as possible. There is a serious need for more female rappers in our lives, and in your lives too, so these songs need some serious sharing:

M.I.A. - Boyz

M.I.A. - Lady Killer

M.I.A. - Paper Planes

M.I.A. - Hussel (f. Afrikan Boy)

Peace out, cub scout. 

*Hopefully, this will soon be a link to the song (as soon as I get it on my computer). In the meantime, watch the absinth-inspired music video on Youtube:

Nine Inch Nails - The Perfect Drug

** Name changed to protect identity of family. (However, friends of the family can figure out how the name "Bad Food" is a derivation of the family name.)

Are You Unpoopular? Do you pop out at parties?

Roxie is excited! It seems like there's a good chance of her getting that summer job as a camp councilor! She'll hear sometime tomorrow for sure, after her hopefully-soon-to-be boss checks that she is not a criminal. She'll also be auditioning to be in a friend's feature-length film that he's filming this summer, so that should make for an awesomely busy summer.

So after yesterday's adventure to pick up Tom on his return home from the army and playing rock-band (discovering that playing drums is HARD), today we ventured to the auto parts store and bought Roxie a new headlight! We also dropped off some dry-cleaning. And, of course, went to A&P to get a four-pack of redbull and sat by the river at Philip's Field to drink it. Isn't that exciting? 

Yes, people, that means that today, Roxie learned to change a headlight all by herself! Well not exactly by herself, with a little help from Reno's dad while Reno went to cater (which ought to be fun considering her pained arms and fingers from the rock-band escapade) 

Last night, after a little inspiration from BU's production of Reefer Madness, Roxie discovered that the whole Reefer Madness made for TV movie exists on youtube. As you can probably guess, that means that last night, she watched the whole thing in its ridiculous entirety, and now feels the need to post a video, so here's a clip for your enjoyment. Please revel in the ridiculous:

Other things that need sharing include Basement Jaxx's Take Me Back To Your House, which is a fantastic song with a video to match the song's magnitude of awesome. Make sure to notice that around 4 minutes into the video, some people seem to be literally flying across the top of the screen. Maybe they've been thrown, or just have massive leg power. 

It has taken Roxie absolutely FOREVER to actually find the song because the only versions of it that she could find were weird remixes that, frankly, weren't very good. So the song came off of iTunes, which means that downloading it may be difficult. It might be "protected" and, if it is, then you'll be stuck having to watch the video over and over just to listen to the song. Let me know if you can play it without having to authorize or something weird like that. I don't know. Anyway, have a video:

and a song:

Basement Jaxx - Take Me Back To Your House

Our planned trip to Child's Park tomorrow seems unlikely, considering that they're predicting thundershowers. Oh well, re-scheduling time! Be on the lookout for pictures of that upcoming excursion, whenever it happens!

I feel the need to post more music. These have been showing up on my Pandora Radio a lot lately, and I've really started to like them. They're good songs to segue into summer, and I mean, c'mon, it's Regina Spektor, so that equals good. Have a listen:

Regina Spektor - That Time

Regina Spektor - Hotel Song

Another female artist that we love: Britney Spears. Don't judge; we know she's crazy and all, but you have to give her most recent album a listen, and ignore that hideous performance of Gimme More. This song helped me get my @$$ to class on many-a-winter-morning, and it's a great dance song:

Britney Spears - Toy Soldier

Also, we look really lame if no one comments on this zine/blog zog, so please make us seem poopular, and comment. plzkthnx. 

Backseat Blogging

We had a good day yesterday, even though it was pouring rain the whole time. Reno installed recessed lights and snaked wires and got sheetrock dust in her eyes and then went and babysat. Roxie did laundry I think. Then we took my little brother to the mall and bought shirts to cover our little Buddha bellies. Hooray! We spritzed ourselves with "8" fragrance from Abercrombie, our old stomping grounds, and then made fun of the teenagers walking around. Eventually we went with Reno's ex to pick up our good friend, Tom, that we haven't seen in ages! The jeep was loud and bumpy on the highway and we eventually got terribly lost in Newark as we tend to do. It ended up being a fabulous adventure like a tourist attraction. ("That kid is hardcore! He has TWO doo-rags!") We saw hole-in-the-wall eateries and angry drunkards and even an extremely lewd-sounding car wash (Blinking neon lights: "WASH AND LUBE"). Then we went and got coffee and saw this very un-P.C. guy which required a photo:


After that it was an intense round of Rock Band before retiring to our cozy beds to dream about entire buildings turning into elevators.

TUNAGE TIME!

I know we just posted some MGMT but Reno freaking loves this song. It's so jumpy bumpy sweet groovy-ness.

MGMT- Electric Feel

Also, Kleerup did a sweet sweet song with our beloved girly girl artist Robyn, and now with our new love Lykke Li. She's gonna be big... plus this song is uber sweet and rather melodic dark and awesome.

Kleerup feat. Lykke Li- Until We Bleed


LOVE!

bye bye.

You! Me! Dancing!

Oh man, so we have returned from our ramble to Hoboken. Let us preface this by saying that we have a tendency to get lost, doesn't matter where we go. One time, we were trying to return home from Weehawken and we somehow ended up in Trenton.

So on THIS outing we inevitably got lost again. We definitely spent some time driving around Jersey City trying not to enter the Holland Tunnel and end up in the city. So we had to call Reno's dad and pull out the super-large-Jersey-map to try and figure out where we were. It took about half an hour to learn that we were NOT in fact in Hoboken, but in Jersey City. Oops.

Anyway... THE SHOW! was fun. It opened with The Orion Experience, which we just discovered probably gets its namesake from the lead singer: Orion Simprini. They were extremely hip and dance-y, and one of the vocalists Linda had these fun red boots and pink eyeshadow. Her performance was absolutely entertaining to watch, and we are pretty sure we know what she would look like having sex. That's how INTO IT she was.

Check them out, because they're hott (with two t's):

The Orion Experience

Onto Los Campesinos!. Seven members on one stage... you think it would be crowded or something, but no. Most of them looked like teenagers and the lead singer was like a small child in his mannerisms. One of the best parts was watching him mime the lyrics to all the songs. Plus, he wore Keds. Fab. This was the first show of their first full U.S. tour (we feel special) and we got to be right up at the front so head-tossing was a necessity. It was also a necessity for the people behind us, so we experienced a lot of hair-smacking.

So we stole (well not stole exactly... well actually yeah, stole) their set list. Check it out:

Basically, the last three songs rocked worlds (despite the technical difficulties, which left the audience clapping to keep the beat for about a minute while the guitarist re-tuned/switched guitars/fiddled with more electronics that we don't understand - particularly the polka-dot pedal)

The show was totally kickass live, even though we got smashed against speakers and someone stepped on Reno's hat. Plus the girl behind Reno kept trying to push her way to the front with her boobs. Dang girls. In addition to the boob-chick, the guy behind Roxie probably hit her in the head at least three times in his jumping fit. Dang guys, too. Our knees ache from jumping and our hair is a mess from throwing our heads around but it was worth it.

Before (yes, that is the interior of Maxwell's Ladies Room):

After:

There was no encore but the crowd was screaming SWEET DREAMS SWEET CHEEKS for a good twenty minutes before they gave up. It turned into some sort of a cappella version of the song, including boys randomly singing the synth line, and a beat-boxer.

For your enjoyment, we have the song (not the crowd's version, but the actual one) along with our personal favorites:

Los Campesinos! - Sweet Dreams Sweet Cheeks

Los Campesinos! - You! Me! Dancing! (Roxie's Fave)

Los Campesinos! - We Throw Parties, You Throw Knives (Reno's Fave)

OH and sadly, sadly, we got out into the fresh air to find that we had acquired a nearly indecipherable parking ticket for parking .. at a bus stop? I don't know. It's okay. IT'S A LEARNING EXPERIENCE as we are sure our parents will tell us, shaking their heads.

Los Campesinos! Trick-or-treat

On your driveway

In the middle of August

One of us dressed as a zombie

One of us dressed as a pirate

One of us dressed as a ninja

Four of us dressed as schoolgirls...

Coffee for Lunch

We are very very terribly excited for tonight when we are going to see LOS CAMPESINOS! at Maxwell's in Hoboken. There will definitely be some crazy postage about that on the morrow. Right now we want to talk about the joys of abandoned houses, where we spent most of our day taking pictures.


Reno had coffee for lunch. Roxie had Cinnamon Toast Crunch because she wakes up in the afternoon and gets her meals confused. We're a healthy duo. Also Reno painted the trim in the bathroom but that wasn't really newsworthy, except for the part where she drove an enormous van to the hardware store and got wood putty. Roxie needs to go to the hardware store to get a new headlight after trying to replace her burnt out one with a taillight.



We would like to share with you a fabulous song and it's equally retro-fab music video. Bloc Party and poorly constructed monster costumes, anyone?

Bloc Party - Flux

On the top of our Recently Played these days:

Ratatat - Shiller

Ratatat's new single! Very chill, very Clockwork Orange, very ooh-ahh. We love Ratatat and all their remixes too. (Reno's ringtone is "Wildcat.")


WE ARE HAVING STEAK FAJITAS FOR DINNER
(not red bull. sad.)

hoboken ho!

Oh! Almost forgot! (pwhew. crisis avoided.) We made a new friend today. His name is Albert, and he lives in our town. He looks like this:


Albert may be a woodchuck. At least we think that's what he is, but we're not exactly sure. Regardless of species he is cute, and clumsy. (exhibit a: Albert falls into small hole) It's like in Winnie the Pooh, when Roo is running around and his monologue keeps getting interrupted as he falls into mouse-holes in the hill. Aww.

Read up on your A.A. Milne, people. Seriously.

Too Fat for Facebook

HAIKU OF THE DAY
baseball at the beach
this chai tea is far too hot
let's get our nails done.

Hello hello Web 2.0. We're two Jersey girls who like to drive in cars and the like. This is a chronicle of our summer. It is this cutting edge concept that we are dubbing with a portmanteau: ZINE + BLOG = ZOG. That means there will be some tunes, some photographs, some poetry, some artwork, and some ramblings. Aren't you terribly excited? Henceforth, without any further ado...

Welcome to our Zog. The internet is a scary place so we are giving ourselves some code names:
We are BFFLOLs Reno and Roxie. Here we go.

So TODAY we went to the beach with our frenchie exchange student Aimeric. His interests include tackling Reno and playing lefty guitar. We drove along blasting the Wall and other lovely tunes, windows down, and then we went to drop off the Frenchie at the airport.

Aimeric:

ANOTHER HAIKU OF THE DAY
lost in the airport.
that cop keeps glaring at me.
let's go drive topless!

MORE IMPORTANTLY, TUNAGE

So lately we are ALL about the electronica. We've been bopping our heads to this crazy Muscles song with some guy yelling in the background, and also grooving to some serious MGMT. Get on it. It's perfect for a sunny Jersey day with the top down on your Chrysler. Let's get ice cream, okay?

MGMT- Kids
Muscles- Hey Muscles I Love You

On a parting note, we are starting a new diet and exercise regimen. It involves spandex. Have a look.



"Hey Reno? By any chance have you transcribed every word she says so you can boogie at home and memorize her monologue of absurdity?"
"Funny you should ask...
yeah."

-Reno and Roxie, over and out.